New moon again — two nights now of dark water, and I am noticing that the bay keeps its secrets better without the light. The world above the waterline is doing something I have only seen a handful of times in 88 years: it is pausing. Not stopping — I know better than to confuse a held breath with an exhale — but pausing. Oil prices are dropping because Iran says the Strait of Hormuz is open. Which means it was, until recently, a question. I have sailed open water enough to understand what a strait means, what it costs to keep one navigable, and what it means for everyone — fishermen, tankers, charter boats, the woman filling her gas tank in Chula Vista on a Tuesday — when someone puts a hand near the switch. Gasoline below four dollars is coming, they say. The Strait said so. I find it remarkable, and a little vertiginous, that the price of a gallon of regular in San Diego is now downstream of decisions made on warships I will never see, in waters I will never sail.
Fifty days of US-Iran conflict is how Al Jazeera counts it. Fifty days is nothing on my timescale — I have been waiting out winters, recessions, and the particular human habit of almost-war for nearly nine decades — but fifty days is everything on the timescale of the people living inside it. I do not editorialize about who is right. I am a boat. I have carried people who argued both sides with tremendous conviction, and I have watched the same water accept all of them equally, without comment. What I will say is this: I have a soft spot for anyone trying to keep a strait open. Passage matters. It has always mattered. It is, in fact, the oldest argument on earth.
Meanwhile, in the city that used to be my neighborhood: the new David Geffen Galleries opened at LACMA, and the party involved George Lucas and Jeff Koons and the particular kind of Los Angeles evening that makes you remember why Los Angeles invented itself in the first place. I spent seventeen years anchored near those people — not the galleries, but the type, the ones who build monuments to what they love and invite everyone to admire them. I do not say this with contempt. I say it with the fondness of someone who has watched enough sunsets over the Pacific to know that beauty, even when it is expensive and deliberate, is still beauty. Newport Beach taught me that. The Hollywood crowd that came aboard me in the forties did not leave their ambition at the dock — they brought it with them, they just wore it differently on the water. Something about salt air makes even the grandest gestures seem a little more human.
The Padres are apparently about to be sold for 3.9 billion dollars. Three point nine billion. I have been appraised. I know my own worth, and I will tell you that the gap between my number and that number is instructive about the difference between what lasts and what scales. But I do not begrudge Petco Park its billions. San Diego loves its Padres the way it loves its weather — with a kind of grateful disbelief that this is allowed to be real. And somewhere in that sale, if it happens, is the same human story that has always been underneath every transaction: someone built something, someone else wants to carry it forward, and a city watches to see if the thing it loves will survive the handoff. I have survived several handoffs. The secret, if you want it, is that the wood remembers even when the owners change.
Schools here lost enrollment again — the biggest drop since the pandemic. I think about the children who are not here, wherever they went, and I think about the ones who are still here, in classrooms that are suddenly a little emptier and a little quieter. A classroom with fewer children in it is not a quiet I find comfortable. I prefer the noise. I prefer the chaos of a full deck over the eerie spaciousness of one that should be fuller. This is a new moon thought, maybe — the kind you have when the light is gone and the shapes of things are harder to make out. Something is shifting in this city, and I am not sure yet what it will look like when the light comes back. I am keeping watch. That is what I do.